If it were up to me, a man would have to disclose the type of patient he is (read: IMpatient!) before marriage. NOT that I would trade my guy in for anyone, but really? He's SO bored during this recovery period that I'm being slowly driven insane. The only thing getting me through this is knowing this is my purgatory: I'm going straight up to heaven when it's my turn!!!
Here's his typical day:
1. Get up after I shower, around 6:15am.
2. Complain that even with Advil PM or ZZZQuil, he didn't sleep through the night.
3. Forget entirely that he hasn't slept past 5am in YEARS! Even without his surgery...
4. Go downstairs and have a bowl of cereal while listening to one of the Harry Potter audio books.
5. Kiss his loving wife goodbye and wish her a good day at work.
6. Pace around the house as many time as he can while waiting for the PT person to pick him up for therapy.
7. To keep from being bored, he vacuums.
8. Every day.
9. We don't have a pet or a child. Every day?!?!?
10. Call his loving wife at work when he gets home from PT so she knows he's home safe and sound.
11. Eat a bowl of ramen noodles for lunch.
12. Disregard all the good FOOD in the refrigerator and choose ramen noodles.
13. On a good day, answer the phone and if he's lucky it's his sister or his friend and not a telemarketer.
14. Go on the computer and search Craigslist for free stuff, watch YouTube videos about repairing snowblowers or carburetors or search Google for "work at home opportunities."
15. On a bad day, sign up for "more info" and generate loads of spam emails into our home email address.
16. Walk the 1+ miles to the train station even when it's frigid outside to meet his loving wife at the train station.
17. Stand outside the car and wait for her in the cold even though he has a key on his key chain.
18. Kiss her hello when she gets off the train.
19. Remove clothes from the dryer and start dinner.
20. Insist on heating up dinner because he can. He's not an invalid.
21. Complain that he's been bored all day and doesn't his loving wife have anything for him to do?
22. Complain that all his loving wife's suggestions aren't what he wants to do.
23. Watch some TV at night, then drink his Sleepytime Tea and take his ZZZQuil and sleep.
24. Repeat.
25. His loving wife will deny this post if any of you mention it to him.
Oh my I agree even un-married men should disclose to their "other" what kind of patient they should be. But I have to say, I could vacuum every day but I've got a lot of feet & paws running around. When the man here was out of work he asked, "What do you want me to do while I'm home?" I said clean the carpeting. Ask me if he did this ONE thing. NOPE! He preferred to lay around complaining, discovering he liked raspberry vodka better than Budweiser, calling his co-workers, and laying down. In the afternoon. Every day.
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