Getting Old - Dying Young

Yes, I'm talking about me.

I don't think "hypochondriac" was ever a word anyone would have used to describe me. At least, not "then."

"Now?" I'm not so sure.

As I get older, and trust me, these days 48 is "older," every little ache and pain scares me. (I am on the down side of the hill now!!! Even though I'm officially 2 years away from that "over the hill party" I told my daughter she has to throw me!) I am not so reluctant to go to a doctor, or take a pill, or do what has to be done to "make it better." (Remember the days when a kiss was all it took? Them days are loooong gone, baby!)

As people close to me get older, they begin to complain of aches and pains, too, and sometimes they have to go the doctor. Then they tell me their doctor's diagnosis.

And all of a sudden, when I have a similar twinge in a spot close to where they hurt, all of a sudden, I am the one with an ulcer, or arthritis, or cancer, or a tumor...

I know this is overreacting at its best. But I can't help it.

I now have a sore spot on my head. Yes, on my head. Right on the left side of my face, where my glasses just begin to touch my face, in front of my ear, on the top of my cheekbone. And just to prove the pain is there, I've had to press it so it hurts every few minutes for the past three hours, since I noticed it for the first time!

It feels like a bone bruise, it's that sort of dull, bruising ache, only when I touch it. But on my cheekbone? It's got to be cancer. Or a tumor like my sister's boyfriend just had removed. Or a fracture (NO, Jack didn't take a swing at me!). Or maybe my sinuses are congested.

But there's something not quite right.

And now I'll have to press on it until Monday night, March 9, when Jack has a doctor's appointment for an annual physical. That night I'll have to ask Dr. R. what it could be.

If it hurts that long.

And Lord knows it will 'cause I will physically be incapable of not pressing on that sore spot until I see the doctor that night. So even if it is supposed to be nothing, and stop hurting, it won't 'cause I'm gonna push and nag and press and bruise that spot until I actually hurt myself!!! (Compulsive, you think?!?)